In 1.5 weeks I will be saying goodbye to all that I know in Southern California and I'll be beginning my journey of moving to New York. As the time quickly approaches, I find myself saying goodbye and explaining to others and trying to justify (to others and to myself) what I'm doing.
The wrapping up of my life in California has begun. My calendar is quickly filling up with coffee dates, dinner dates and many other fun-filled goodbyes with good friends and my family. As my calendar fills, so does my heart. I hate goodbyes. It's really starting to sink in that I'm moving to NY, not just venturing off an another one of my trips. In the past, I've said goodbye but knew that I'd be returning. This time, who knows. I'm moving to NY, I'm not just taking a trip there. After living abroad for a year and returning to the same friends I left behind (and with a large number of new, amazing friends around the world), I realized that true friends last and that I'm blessed with the ability to make good, quality friends. This is good but it makes saying goodbye harder.
I know that life will continue in California without me. My friends will continue to be themselves and have new experiences that I will not be a part of. My twin sister will be molding her own life without me by her side. But I also know that this isn't the end. Often times I get caught up in the goodbye and forget that goodbye isn't forever. I will keep in touch and I will come back and visit and I do expect visitors. I want to continue to be a part of people's lives.
I live a crazy life, I know. I'm determined to live my life to the fullest and at this point in time, that means moving to New York to pursue a career in journalism. Yes, I'm adventurous and yes, I'm taking a huge leap. But if I don't leap, I'll never know what lies beyond. While I'm sad to leave my loved ones and friends, I'm excited for my future, whatever it may be. I'm also excited for everyone else's futures. Life is unpredictable. Even if you're one of those people who thinks you've got your entire life planned out, life is unpredictable. It's that uncertainty that keeps me going and fuels my pursuit.
Thanks for the memories and cheers to the many memories that lie ahead!
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
The joy of excitement
On October 9th, 2005 I sat on my bed in my lonely room on the Greek island of Evia where tears were always on the verge of gushing down my face, writing in my journal about excitement. I had spent months prior to my arrival in Greece imagining what life would be like and how amazing it would be. I had no idea that I'd end up lonely and sad in a little fishing village. I know what it feels like to be disappointed and to have to deal with it, yet, to this day, I still get excited.
I'm a firm believer in excitement.
Wonderful fantasies cloud the brain. It's that feeling in your chest and the floating pictures in your mind of what might happen. Excitement consists of bottomless expectations. Expectations of unknown experiences that are soon to come. The experience of new places or certain events that will leave impressions on your life leave you giddy and hopeful.
While excitement is amazing, the moment it begins also marks the moment of its decline. The closer the actual journey or event becomes, the closer the excitement ends. The moment the experience begins, excitement is thrown out the window only to be replaced by the harshness of reality. While the experience might manifest to be even more amazing than what was fathomed (if you're lucky), the moment it begins, the countdown to its end does as well.
No one has the ability of knowing exactly what will happen in the future so we are all left with an imagination and the feeling of excitement. Reality is, nothing lasts forever. While it sounds pessimistic, it is merely fact. If reality turns out to be in line with one's fantasies and excitement, one must hold on to the experience. Cherish it and let it play out for as long as humanly possible.
If one is faced with an experience that is not pleasant, it is important to remember that, "it too shall pass" (my mother's wise words).
In the end, we must hold on dearly to excitement and cherish everything that it embodies because it fades quickly and is replaced by greatness or disappointment. Remember that no one can take your excitement away from you. It's an amazing feeling within yourself that makes you look forward to the future. It keeps you going. It's important.
So, get excited. Be aware of your excitement. Cherish it.
I'm a firm believer in excitement.
Wonderful fantasies cloud the brain. It's that feeling in your chest and the floating pictures in your mind of what might happen. Excitement consists of bottomless expectations. Expectations of unknown experiences that are soon to come. The experience of new places or certain events that will leave impressions on your life leave you giddy and hopeful.
While excitement is amazing, the moment it begins also marks the moment of its decline. The closer the actual journey or event becomes, the closer the excitement ends. The moment the experience begins, excitement is thrown out the window only to be replaced by the harshness of reality. While the experience might manifest to be even more amazing than what was fathomed (if you're lucky), the moment it begins, the countdown to its end does as well.
No one has the ability of knowing exactly what will happen in the future so we are all left with an imagination and the feeling of excitement. Reality is, nothing lasts forever. While it sounds pessimistic, it is merely fact. If reality turns out to be in line with one's fantasies and excitement, one must hold on to the experience. Cherish it and let it play out for as long as humanly possible.
If one is faced with an experience that is not pleasant, it is important to remember that, "it too shall pass" (my mother's wise words).
In the end, we must hold on dearly to excitement and cherish everything that it embodies because it fades quickly and is replaced by greatness or disappointment. Remember that no one can take your excitement away from you. It's an amazing feeling within yourself that makes you look forward to the future. It keeps you going. It's important.
So, get excited. Be aware of your excitement. Cherish it.
Friday, August 10, 2007
Hugs
What's in a hug?
To hug or not to hug? You know what I'm talking about. Those often-times awkward moments in which you aren't sure if you should just wave or if you should reach your arms out and embrace the person. If you do decide to go in for the hug...which position do you choose? The "side hug" the "above the shoulder" the "belly embrace" the "cheek kiss/European approach" the "one arm above and one arm below" the "hug and rub" or the "hug and pat?" Once you figure out where to place the arms, how close do you get? How long do you stay there for? So many combinations and so much to think about in a split second!
I've always found the degree to which a person chooses to commit to the hug very interesting. As judgmental as it is, I admit that I evaluate a relationship based on the hug. The next time you embrace a loved one or a dear friend, throw out everything on your mind and just be in that moment. Feel the hug. Feel the other person's energy. Feel your face. Are you smiling? Most likely, you are. Seconds before the embrace, you are not thinking about where to place your hands or how hard you should grab the other person. It comes naturally. All hugs are not like that. You do not have the same relationship with every person you come in contact with or know. Have you ever hugged someone and felt as though you were embracing them slightly tighter than they were embracing you? You can say that they just don't "give good hugs." Or, perhaps it's because you differ in your evaluation of the relationship.
In spite of this, I think there are three kinds of people: "huggers," "in-betweens" and "non-huggers." The "huggers" usually hug after the first meeting. Sometimes even when they first meet a person. The "in-betweens" judge the situation and will hug the "huggers" back but don't initiate a hug with "non-huggers." The "non-huggers" aren't huge fan of hugs. They don't initiate a hug and react stiffly when a hug is sprung on them. These labels come into effect more often in new encounters or in relationships that aren't necessarily intimate. What kind of "hugger" are you? Why?
"Free Hugs"
I came across a YouTube video tonight titled "Free Hugs." A man stands on a busy pedestrian walkway with a sign that says "free hugs" and the video shows people's reactions. Some react favorably and some don't. It dawned on me while watching it that if I saw a guy on the street with a sign like that, I'd probably think he was weird and continue on my way. I wouldn't give the situation a second thought. However, if I were to sit and watch the guy and observe his varied responses, I'm sure I'd go up to him and give him a hug. This saddens me. It's another example of being caught up in my own world. Of course, who knows how I'd truly react if I were one of the pedestrians. I really hope I'm wrong about myself in this situation. I want to be wrong. Check out the link. Watch the video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4
To hug or not to hug? You know what I'm talking about. Those often-times awkward moments in which you aren't sure if you should just wave or if you should reach your arms out and embrace the person. If you do decide to go in for the hug...which position do you choose? The "side hug" the "above the shoulder" the "belly embrace" the "cheek kiss/European approach" the "one arm above and one arm below" the "hug and rub" or the "hug and pat?" Once you figure out where to place the arms, how close do you get? How long do you stay there for? So many combinations and so much to think about in a split second!
I've always found the degree to which a person chooses to commit to the hug very interesting. As judgmental as it is, I admit that I evaluate a relationship based on the hug. The next time you embrace a loved one or a dear friend, throw out everything on your mind and just be in that moment. Feel the hug. Feel the other person's energy. Feel your face. Are you smiling? Most likely, you are. Seconds before the embrace, you are not thinking about where to place your hands or how hard you should grab the other person. It comes naturally. All hugs are not like that. You do not have the same relationship with every person you come in contact with or know. Have you ever hugged someone and felt as though you were embracing them slightly tighter than they were embracing you? You can say that they just don't "give good hugs." Or, perhaps it's because you differ in your evaluation of the relationship.
In spite of this, I think there are three kinds of people: "huggers," "in-betweens" and "non-huggers." The "huggers" usually hug after the first meeting. Sometimes even when they first meet a person. The "in-betweens" judge the situation and will hug the "huggers" back but don't initiate a hug with "non-huggers." The "non-huggers" aren't huge fan of hugs. They don't initiate a hug and react stiffly when a hug is sprung on them. These labels come into effect more often in new encounters or in relationships that aren't necessarily intimate. What kind of "hugger" are you? Why?
"Free Hugs"
I came across a YouTube video tonight titled "Free Hugs." A man stands on a busy pedestrian walkway with a sign that says "free hugs" and the video shows people's reactions. Some react favorably and some don't. It dawned on me while watching it that if I saw a guy on the street with a sign like that, I'd probably think he was weird and continue on my way. I wouldn't give the situation a second thought. However, if I were to sit and watch the guy and observe his varied responses, I'm sure I'd go up to him and give him a hug. This saddens me. It's another example of being caught up in my own world. Of course, who knows how I'd truly react if I were one of the pedestrians. I really hope I'm wrong about myself in this situation. I want to be wrong. Check out the link. Watch the video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4
An Intro. To My Blog
I got a little ahead of myself the other day and posted my first entry without an introduction! Sooo, here it is:
This blog is about my life and about life in general. Life here and now (Southern California for the time being) and about life in the past and abroad. It's about what I see and experience and about my current thoughts.
Often times I read other people's writing and am inspired, touched, propelled to think, and at times, discouraged. Discouraged in the sense that my writing isn't as powerful or thought provoking as theirs. I call myself a writer, a journalist, yet I don't write as much as I "should." I've decided to change this thought. I want to write about what I see, what I experience. I also want to intermittently share what I experienced while living and traveling abroad. I am the only one who sees it through my eyes, but if I am able to express it in words, then in a sense, you are able to experience/see it as well. My goal in writing these blogs is to bring you (the reader) along on my journey through life. I'll post pictures when I can and do my best to truly describe what I'm thinking or feeling or seeing. I feel that expressing life in words will push me to think more about life around me. In turn, I hope that it will propel you to do the same.
This blog is about my life and about life in general. Life here and now (Southern California for the time being) and about life in the past and abroad. It's about what I see and experience and about my current thoughts.
Often times I read other people's writing and am inspired, touched, propelled to think, and at times, discouraged. Discouraged in the sense that my writing isn't as powerful or thought provoking as theirs. I call myself a writer, a journalist, yet I don't write as much as I "should." I've decided to change this thought. I want to write about what I see, what I experience. I also want to intermittently share what I experienced while living and traveling abroad. I am the only one who sees it through my eyes, but if I am able to express it in words, then in a sense, you are able to experience/see it as well. My goal in writing these blogs is to bring you (the reader) along on my journey through life. I'll post pictures when I can and do my best to truly describe what I'm thinking or feeling or seeing. I feel that expressing life in words will push me to think more about life around me. In turn, I hope that it will propel you to do the same.
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
A Traveling Memory
Cheers to amazing moments that only happen abroad! Below is my most memorable moment from my travels.
The Whirling Bath of Budapest
I hadn’t brought a swim suit with me to Budapest, Hungary but somehow my friend had convinced me that we had to visit the Szecheyi thermal baths and that going in my bra and underwear wouldn’t kill me. Of course, she had her bikini. We walked through the double doors of what appeared to be a castle, completely blind as to what we were about to see and experience. The place was full of pools: warm, cold, thermal, indoor and outdoor. It was the dead of winter but somehow we gathered enough courage to explore the outdoor pools.
The first pool had bubbles/jets coming out of the ground that were strong enough to sit on. We then noticed a circular pool in the middle of the big pool and saw what seemed to be people’s heads going around in a circle. It appeared as though this round pool had jets or a very strong current that was pushing people in a circle.
We decided to enter but in order to do so, we had to wait for a big enough opening. We stood at the space in the wall and held on so as not to get swept away as we waited for the right time to go in; just as you do when you’re about to start jumping rope. Suddenly, I lost all control of my body and was swept away in the never-ending circle. The only way it could end was if you accidentally got pushed to the side at the point where the small opening was. You’d get shot out to the calm water. For a few moments, my friend and I were in our own world talking and laughing hysterically. At one point we glanced around and realized that only one guy was reacting the same way we were. We looked at him and we knew he was a fellow American. We were instantly friends in the whirlpool of locals.
People of all walks of life were mixed up in that whirlpool; old hairy men as well as kids with bright orange floaters. There were even kids attempting to dive below the surface. The issue of modesty and touching other people flew out the window the moment we entered the whirlpool. Who knows what or who I grabbed. I even forgot that I was in my bra and underwear. The jets were so strong that I had absolutely no control of where my body went. Every twenty minutes the whirlpool turned off. I had just enough time to stop laughing and to gather my bearings before the next whirling adventure began. Out of all my adventures abroad, that whirlpool was the highlight. I’d give anything to be back there and to laugh so deeply again!
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